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Walter White Picking Up Food At An Arby’s

Walt approaches the food pick up counter.

CASHIER:  Name please?

WALT:  You know.  You all know exactly who I am.  Say my name.

CASHIER:  Do what?  I really don’t have a clue.

WALT:  Yeah you do.  I’m the guy.  I’m the man who ordered 15 roast beefs and 8 beef and cheddars. 

CASHIER:  No way, that big fat guy ordered that.

WALT:  You sure? 

Walt makes eye contact with the Cashier and then glances down at the tray of food, mouth watering.  The Cashier’s eyes fill with terror when he realizes he’s made a mistake.

WALT:  That’s right.  Now say my name.

The Cashier looks shocked that one man could eat so many roast beef sandwiches with no drink to wash it down.  He starts breathing heavily, almost terrified.

CASHIER:  You’re Heisenberg.

WALT:  You’re damned right.

Walt throws a twenty in the Cashiers face and storms off with his tray of food.  He walks outside and sees Mike yelling at him from his car.

MIKE:  You couldn’t just lay low, you had to go and order 23 beef sandwiches?!

Walt shoots him through the window.  Mike dies.  Walt angrily takes a bite of his beef and cheddar.  A drop of cheddar drips on his shoe.


Leaked Images From “Breaking Bad” Finale

SPOILER ALERT!!!

Julian Assange just sent me these LEAKED images from the series finale of Breaking Bad:

WOW, CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT HAPPENED??!!!!!!

TALK ABOUT A SPOILER ALERT!  I can’t believe that guy died.

Man, this finale is INSANE.

Here it is, the final shot of the series:

If you think those images are crazy, wait until you see the first 10 minutes of the episode that just leaked:

Thanks Julian Assange.

#breaking bad   #tv  
Mr White Meets Jaleel White
Jaleel White, better known as Urkel from Family Matters, wants to guest star on Breaking Bad.  So does every other living actor, but Jaleel White does too.  White says he wants to stop being typecast, much like Breaking Bad’s star Bryan Cranston did after going from the dad on Malcolm In The Middle to Breaking Bad’s drug kingpin Walter White.  So this means we won’t be seeing any scenes of Urkel shooting a Mexican Cartel member in the head and exclaiming “Did I do that?!” or snorting crystal meth off a bowie knife and screaming “Whoa Momma!” 

Mr White Meets Jaleel White

Jaleel White, better known as Urkel from Family Matters, wants to guest star on Breaking Bad.  So does every other living actor, but Jaleel White does too.  White says he wants to stop being typecast, much like Breaking Bad’s star Bryan Cranston did after going from the dad on Malcolm In The Middle to Breaking Bad’s drug kingpin Walter White.  So this means we won’t be seeing any scenes of Urkel shooting a Mexican Cartel member in the head and exclaiming “Did I do that?!” or snorting crystal meth off a bowie knife and screaming “Whoa Momma!” 

This scene from Breaking Bad would be a lot less dramatic if Walt was a Seasonal UPS Driver’s Helper like I was:

“Who are you talking to right now?  Who is it you think you see?  Do you know how much I make an hour?  I mean, even if I told you it was $10.50 you’d probably believe it.  Do you know what would happen if I suddenly stopped going into work?  A business big enough to be listed on the NASDAQ stays on the NASDAQ.  Still there, it exists without me.  They’d probably just call some other guy.  You clearly don’t know who you’re talking to, so let me clue you in: I am NOT THE DRIVER, I AM THE DRIVER’S HELPER.  A guy opens his door and receives a package, and you think that of me?  No, I AM THE ONE WHO KNOCKS, at the door to deliver the package.”

Heisenberg is very different from Jesse Eisenberg.

Heisenberg is very different from Jesse Eisenberg.

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